HAH! This is a funny fanfic
Jan. 6th, 2004 10:33 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ithikaOk, this fic is mostly funny because the person that wrote it has also written some really beautiful fics, like Why the Trees Grow Tall and Illuminating Life. But this is just hillarious...
Legolas had sensed the trespasser long before they had reached arms length. He knew it was another dumbass of a human trying to come take a piece of his coolness. They tried talking like they belonged in a Shakespearean play for a while to woo him, but he got sick of it and started beating the snot out of them. He, you see, is an Elf, and could kick your ass if you tried to rape him, so he kicked this guys ass with mad fury after having read that he was being raped a lot by people who thought he was some flaked out pixie that would shed tears if you snapped the head off of a daisy. He's not, and he will beat your ass if he hears you say so.
Anyway, he kicked the guy's ass and was left chaste in his rear. Don't fucking fuck with Legolas, he'll kick your dumbass ass.
Legolas had sensed the trespasser long before they had reached arms length. He knew it was another dumbass of a human trying to come take a piece of his coolness. They tried talking like they belonged in a Shakespearean play for a while to woo him, but he got sick of it and started beating the snot out of them. He, you see, is an Elf, and could kick your ass if you tried to rape him, so he kicked this guys ass with mad fury after having read that he was being raped a lot by people who thought he was some flaked out pixie that would shed tears if you snapped the head off of a daisy. He's not, and he will beat your ass if he hears you say so.
Anyway, he kicked the guy's ass and was left chaste in his rear. Don't fucking fuck with Legolas, he'll kick your dumbass ass.
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Date: 2004-01-08 06:08 am (UTC)no, the fic's not anti slash. it's anti rape fics. the author's just sick of people abusing characters, and would like to point out that Legolas [or any of the Elves] could kick [anyone's] ass. They don't write/like slash, but they're not anti slash. ah, it's a long story. there's a link to it on stealthic. I'm too lazy to give it to you there... it's pretty obvious which one it is, it's an icon under... uh, the place with all the icons