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ithikaMy Aunty Topsy died at 6am today.
... It was so very, very unexpected, and I still don't believe it. She was never an old person to me. I'd never even seen her sick before so when my mum said she had a cold last week I didn't even worry. Today has been a really bad day. I know most people will say "old people do die" but you probably haven't met her. She always did everything for herself and she was a sturdy old girl. Apparently once some kids broke into her house and she scared them off all by herself, about 3 15 year old kids being scared off by one little 70-something lady. I don't know when I will accept that she's actually gone. We almost kept one of her dogs, Ness, which I think would have helped, but Bonnie wouldn't have any of it. She's always been a constant reliable part of my life. She's known me since I was 10 months old. She was truly as close as family to me. I suppose I always expected her to be 3 doors down from us, where I could just walk in around the back to talk to her or ask for help for some random thing. I went to her house today and it was unbearable. There were all these strange people I'd never met before and I had to knock on the door. She always kept the most beautiful garden, I really hope whoever lives in the house next looks after it as well as she did. I'm going to make my outdoor photo collage thing of it, I think. I don't want to do the inside of her house because those other people have already moved it around. They're her family, by the way. But I never saw them around much. I'm... sad that I'm not one of her "real " family. I know it's feelings that matter most but... I don't know. Feelings are pretty messed up right now. So.. yeah.
Don't take people for granted, because apparently nobody is immortal.
... It was so very, very unexpected, and I still don't believe it. She was never an old person to me. I'd never even seen her sick before so when my mum said she had a cold last week I didn't even worry. Today has been a really bad day. I know most people will say "old people do die" but you probably haven't met her. She always did everything for herself and she was a sturdy old girl. Apparently once some kids broke into her house and she scared them off all by herself, about 3 15 year old kids being scared off by one little 70-something lady. I don't know when I will accept that she's actually gone. We almost kept one of her dogs, Ness, which I think would have helped, but Bonnie wouldn't have any of it. She's always been a constant reliable part of my life. She's known me since I was 10 months old. She was truly as close as family to me. I suppose I always expected her to be 3 doors down from us, where I could just walk in around the back to talk to her or ask for help for some random thing. I went to her house today and it was unbearable. There were all these strange people I'd never met before and I had to knock on the door. She always kept the most beautiful garden, I really hope whoever lives in the house next looks after it as well as she did. I'm going to make my outdoor photo collage thing of it, I think. I don't want to do the inside of her house because those other people have already moved it around. They're her family, by the way. But I never saw them around much. I'm... sad that I'm not one of her "real " family. I know it's feelings that matter most but... I don't know. Feelings are pretty messed up right now. So.. yeah.
Don't take people for granted, because apparently nobody is immortal.
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(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-07 12:49 pm (UTC)It must be the week for unexpected deaths. The (Really really nice guy) who gave us our canary (many years ago) died the other day. It's pretty hard to come to grips with.
*more hugs*
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-08 02:18 pm (UTC):( *more hugs for you too*
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-07 12:58 pm (UTC)You are in my prayers.
xox
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-08 02:26 pm (UTC)*hugs you*
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-07 01:07 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-08 02:26 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-07 01:09 pm (UTC)*hugs*
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-08 02:29 pm (UTC)*hugs back*
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-07 01:10 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-08 02:34 pm (UTC)Thankeees. *hugs*
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-07 01:15 pm (UTC)*hugs*
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-08 02:35 pm (UTC)*hugs back*
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-07 01:26 pm (UTC)She sounds really awesome. I hope her memory lives on. =)
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-08 02:43 pm (UTC)She was, and I'm sure it will. :)
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-07 02:07 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-08 02:43 pm (UTC)And that's okay.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-08 03:51 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-09 02:40 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-07 03:10 pm (UTC)*hugs*
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-08 02:44 pm (UTC)*hugs back*
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-07 03:30 pm (UTC)-hugs- anyway nonetheless :P
Going to be around much this week?
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-08 02:44 pm (UTC)Um. I'm not sure. ??
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-07 05:56 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-08 02:45 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-07 08:34 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-08 02:45 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-08 12:29 am (UTC)*squishes*
(no subject)
Date: 2006-08-08 02:46 pm (UTC)*squishes back*