Running out of words and birds beneath the coolness and dryness

[ithika]

Desert rains and my only gains... - Vulcanella, Magic Dirt

I like Magic Dirt. Those lyrics might be wrong. *shrugs*

I suddenly am buzzen [yes, buzzen] with inspiration. I might even draw something good tonight later on... yay!

I haven't linked to one of Rimfrosts comics in a while, so I thought I might.

Elegant Rabbit = Best chocolate evah. Mmm *munches on rabbit-face* Tasty.
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Today, I did much more than I have in... a while. Ok, so like since Tuesday, which was only two days ago [though it feels like.. *is determinedly cliched in her woe* forever..] I went to visit Great-Aunty Rosemary with my mum today. I felt so very guilty, because she, little old injured lady-in-hospital-type, was so very very happy to see us, and I didn't even remember her. I felt even worse when I realised that even though I liked this lady, I didn't want to be there. She did talk a lot and was generally interesting, though. Sadder and more guilt-inducing was the visit to Great Uncle Milty (her husband, my Grandfather's younger brother), who has Parkinsons. It wasn't too bad today, but there were long silences which were uncomfortable. Parkinsons is such a sad, sad disease. He used to be such a funny man. But! Enough depression. It is making me feel gloomy.

Then we went to the Galleria where I aquired me some well-needed clothings in the top-way-of things. While I did end up getting a few tops, I still have to point out that even when I was being deliberately open-minded, as in, going into stores and genuinely looking for stuff rather than just shunning them, the majority of available clothes are still absolutely shit. I mean... come on people! TASTE! Taste I say! Although winter is a vastly superior season to summer as far as fashion (and everything else) is concerned.
I was very dissapointed with this one jumper, which I really liked, really liked, but didn't suit me. It turned out to be most unflattering. And I was very angry with it. Because I wanted to buy it and cherish it and wear it forever. *sigh* I did buy some nice jumpers [which I have never done before], though. And lone_one has polluted my mind with her justice-drivel (:D), so much that I brought a top with some text on it about justice and it's goodness [yay]. Be proud of me, Arinellen. Proud, I say!

Also, I have a question for all you Neverwinter Nighters out there How the hell do you give the Spirit the friggen potion without it KILLING you?! How? I've tried putting it in the altar, putting it on the ground, using it, etc, etc. I've even tried using it, but that was just dumb and innefectual. I suppose I should find that witch, ay, but I can't find her either. Gah.

I might go now. the missing is getting painful

Unedited...
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Cold, and silence. The gentle curve of the deck, soft against my back, and the moving arc of the sky above, stars swaying to and fro, only noticeable by the black silhouette of the foremast, sails furled, causing the heavenly lights to disappear and reappear in and out of its shadow. Lapping water on the sides of the ship, not quite the sound of waves, but the sound of ocean nonetheless, a soft and bubbling sloshing like the whisper of a thousand breathless, timeless voices. I don’t notice the sway of the ship very much anymore – I adjust my balance to its movements without thinking of it or even realising that I do, when I stand upon the deck. But now, lying silent, I think of how many nights like this have come and gone, how many ship hands have lain on the deck of some tall-masted and fine vessel wondering at the marvel of the moving stars upon the black ocean, how many years, decades, centuries have passed over, under, through these waves of briny deep.

At anchor, the deck at night was far quieter and lonely than when not. A solitary creature I have always been, and so this stillness was as something close to heaven for me. I sometimes wonder, if I had been aware before of the incredible ignorance of our kind, I would have acted as I did. I think not. And yet I do not wish to change my lot in this life – I have done very well, particularly now I can look back a ways, like so many of my kin, to see that for myself. But enough of these idle musings, before both you and I are bored to sleep.

It was a morning much like any other, and I certainly paid little to no heed of how the great orb rose and painted the ocean and the sky in brilliant hues. No, I, on that morning, was… living up to the name of my family. (But more on them later.)

The horse was truly a fine animal, all muscle and sinew, flying mane and pawing hoof. He was a deep bay, and in the light his fur took on the hue of crimson blood. In the dawn, I coaxed him from his stall, I all hooded and cloaked; he saddled and bridled with my own humble tack, rather than the finer gear that was the mark of his fine blood. Better by far to be an unremarkable traveller with a fluke of a fine horse than steal a dukes’ mount and tack in the same day.
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Note: not for Creative Writng. But I'd appreciate comments either way.

Comments

[arinellen.livejournal.com]

I haven't read it all but I am proud *grins*

[bloodied-aura.livejournal.com]

Ohh, you should be *grins back*
By the way, I don't think I'm a rogue anymore, I think I'm more of a Druid again...

[velithya]

I really like the style here, just a few things jolted me out of it.
-Tense. I am not sure what is past and what is present, what has happened and what /is/ happening, if you know what I mean.
-"how many ship hands have lain on the deck" I would say, how many deckhands have lain on the boards or something. I hear deckhands a lot more commonly than I hear ship hands, but this is really up to you. :)
-"how the great orb rose" This is probably a throw-back to my days of reading bad fanfiction (particularly mary-sues) - they would always be described with flowery prose and to this day anything that seems overly flowery tends to throw me out of the story. Everything else in the passage seemed fine, it was just this one that made me blink and go "..."
-One nitpicky thing regards horses; if your use of deep means dark then a deep bay is going to be more black than red. In fact, they aren't really going to be red at all. Perhaps a chestnut or a roan would have more of the blood effect you are after?

So, anyway, I thought it was neat, I hope my commentary helps.

Have you sailed on the Leeuwin? :P

[bloodied-aura.livejournal.com]

Thanks much for the commentary! It always helps to get constructive criticism :)

Ohhh yes, yes I have. :D